Happy people live secure in the knowledge that the activities that bring them enjoyment in the present will also lead to a fulfilling future.

~Tal Ben Shahar Ph.D.

from the book Happier

This quote hit me right between the eyes. I read it several times to get the full effect. It is so simple yet it seems like new information to my tired brain.

This book focuses on the science, philosophy and trends within the pursuit of happiness. It is based on a course that this guy teaches at Harvard.

Some other thoughts to ponder, just 16 pages into the book:

• Happiness is a continuum and not a destination.


• The real question to ask is, "How can I become happier?"


• Create rituals rather than forcing self discipline.


• Keep a gratitude journal--remember 5 things nightly about your day of which you are grateful for. Studies show that people who do this are more happy.

Swap Party!

I was at the dentist today, in anticipation of my much awaited root canal and was given a magazine to read. In the Better Homes and Gardens current issue, it suggests hosting a swap party. I think that is a lovely idea.

So, I propose we spend January going through our prospective junk (I mean treasure) and prepare for a shindig during the dead of February when it is cold and there is a lull in the action.

We can bring our items and swap for other items that are being laid aside.

Here are the rules for the swap. One rule is that once you bring an item to the swap it is no longer yours. All left over items will be donated to the Columbus Catholic Worker Free Store.

February 20, 2010 at 3:00 pm. If you are interested, let me know and I will send you along an invitation with particulars. There will be warm drinks and light refreshments provided.

Hiccup Cure--Not!

The kids and I were in the grocery store the other day and Alea said she had the hiccups. Being the good mom that I am I tried to scare her hiccups away. I tried a, "Boo" as I turned toward her looking all googly eyed.

She said, "Mom, your not scary!"

I exclaimed, "I'm not?" Looking dejected.

Kye pipes up, "Well, Mom, you are like a protector, how can you be scary?"

I like the way the kid thinks!

Challengeizzle!

Had the family over for our Christmas celebration today. We always get together after the holiday to ensure that each of us will be present. In times past we sometimes found that one of us had to be at the in laws and it would not feel quite right. So we decided to ditch the whole, "have to have Christmas exactly on December 25th" idea. It has worked out beautifully.

Today was no exception the food was great, company pleasant and we had a great time.

We tried out a new game called Quelf that I purchased for my niece Becca. Loads of fun. Also very silly and game challenges you to step outside of your comfort zone--not too much, but enough.

Whether it was adding the suffix "izzle" to every statement or pretending you are a pilot doing announcements, there was some fun in it for us all.

Whilst playing the game, I did come to a realization though. We were almost done, needed to close up shop at 7:00 and had about 9 minutes to go. It was my turn and my instructions were to point up to the sky, announce that my turn was completed and then continue to stare off "into space" until my next turn. I dutifully followed the directions on the card and several folks interacted with me and noticed my gaze was not with the board. My son Quinn was most perplexed and felt he needed to poke me and verbally challenge me to give him eye contact.

I remained stead fast. I was determined to live up to the challenge.

Then as three others took turns, I realized that a question was popping in my head. Do I stick it out --tenaciously keeping my commitment to off staring or do I decide to take a penalty and join the group in their revelry?

I decided to spend the following 4 minutes engaged in the activity rather than fulfilling the card requirement. I do not regret my decision. Others noticed I failed my task, but it was a small price to pay for I chose the path.

This silly little exercise did make me think though. How many times do I stick with something that ultimately will leave me unfulfilled? How often do I let stubbornness or determination get in the way of my true why behind? How much of my life do I live according to "the" rules or my own preconceived rules?

The simple act of taking stock and seeing choices really helped me to recognize a path rather than living blindly. Now there is something to be said for going with the flow or respecting rules. There is a time for everything. This exercise was one of just realizing that we do have choices in each situation and making them consciously can be a really good thing.

An author whom I like, Seth Godin, has a great little book that gives guidance about this very thing. The name of the book is Dip; A little book that teaches you when to quit (and when to stick). You can take a sneak peek here.

Now, if I can only remember to stop, reflect, and choose.........here's to consciousness!

Eternal Sunshine

Watched an interesting movie a couple of nights ago. With a science fiction flair the film explores a relationship between two people who are dysfunctional at best. Within the film you get a sense that relationships can be tumultuous, yet loving and fulfilling in their own way. I suppose all relationships, at least the ones that matter, take work and acceptance of what is brought to the table. We are all so horribly and beautifully imperfect. This movie does a nice job of depicting this.

Here is what Wikipedia has to say:
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia: "Emotionally withdrawn Joel Barish (Jim Carrey) and dysfunctional free spirit Clementine Kruczynski (Kate Winslet) strike up a relationship on a Long Island Rail Road train from Montauk. They are inexplicably drawn to each other, despite their radically different personalities."

Call to Ponder

There are seven sins in the world:

Wealth without work,
Pleasure without conscience,
Knowledge without character,
Commerce without morality,
Science without humanity,
Worship without sacrifice,
and, politics without principle.

Mahatma Gandhi

My Aching Back! and Legs, and Arms!

Worked out the day before Thanksgiving and zealously participated in the festivities. Too much I am afraid. I have not been able to climb stairs or walk normally since. Who would have thought that a gazillion lunge/squats would do such a thing?

WAKE UP CALL!

For the first time I have a window into what it would be like to be in constant pain. Aching while moving, aching while staying still. Not my idea of fun or fulfilling. So, as my witness here, I pledge to make an effort in training my body toward peak function. I want to be as mobile and flexible as possible throughout my life. I think the key is using your body in many ways, stretching, playing, walking etc.

Today I have taken things easy--enjoyed a great Thanksgiving meal, put up the tree and played games (Twister was one of them). I was grateful when I toppled over, so I could rest the bones.

Tomorrow is a new day, may it be a day of motion.

The Love Priciples

I came across The Love Principles in a stack of stuff I have saved from past research. Below, I have printed this in it's entirety. I am experiencing transformation lately and these principles ring true to this process for me; thought I would share.

THE LOVE PRINCIPLES

(as received in 1970)

• Receive all persons as beautiful exactly as they are.


• Be the change you want to see, instead of trying to change anyone else.


• Create your own reality consciously.


• Provide others with opportunities to give.


• Have no expectations, but rather abundant expectancy.


• Problems are opportunities.

~Arleen Lorrance

Choice is a life process. In every new moment of awareness, you are free to make a new choice.

This list is a good one and I find that for some of the items I have a natural inclination (seeing beauty, opportunities to give and a positive perspective on problems) but the others hold difficulty on some level. I am going to consciously meditate on these principles this week and see where that leads me-- care to join me?

Word of the Day from Kye

As Kye was helping cook the evening meal last night he said, "Mom, what a stench coming from the compost bin!"


I asked him what the word stench meant and he said, "a bad smell".


I later asked both Quinn and Alea if they knew what the word meant and both replied, "no". Kye then informed them.

Gotta love it when the youngest teaches us.

Nick Vujicic

Inspiring Video: